If I had to ask you to define a victim without a dictionary, what would you say? Something happens to you that is negative or harmful and not of your choosing? Let me ask you this: Would any reasonable or sane person ask to become a victim? The pertinent dictionary…

Narcissistic baiting comes in three distinct ways and at three different stages in the cycle of this emotional abuse. There are other mechanisms at play and used during these three phases. They are often used deliberately, methodically and without guilt. Bait One. The first time that baiting is used, it…

It’s Okay to not be Okay Now, I’ll admit, I am spinning out with a distinct lack of a sense of purpose. Lockdown due to COVID 19 has affected everyone on the planet in some way or another, and we are all in our own ways, spinning out. I pull…

All illusions become a reality given enough time. I seem to recall reading that somewhere long ago. Are panic disorders and anxiety attacks just that? Illusions, the things that we fear the most, made physically manifest in our bodies? How is anxiety, perceived? An illusion? To those looking in from…

As I enter my fifties, something that I have been battling with is how to dissolve the crystallised feelings of hatred, betrayal and bitter resentment and come out the other side of this process wiser and calmer, with set intentions to be able to move on. What strikes me about…

On holiday recently, we were in the bush, it was notably green and lush, and there were many creeping and crawling creatures around us. We’d decided to go out, and I was in the process of putting on my sneakers when I suddenly remembered to tip them out first and…

The Gamblers Game. Love Bombing and Systematic Denigration in Narcissistic Abuse. ‘Every gambler knows that the secret to survival is knowing what to throw away and knowing what to keep’ The Gambler by Kenny Rogers Systematic denigration is a high stakes poker game with your sanity. The deliberate acts of…

When I say the word gaslighting, I’m pretty sure most people well versed on narcissism immediately have the association with the movie from which it was named. The phenomenon ‘gaslighting’ is a well-known topic to most people who have researched narcissism in great depth, and most of those people are…

Synonyms for ‘If’ are stipulation, proviso, or condition. Did you think that you had suddenly found yourself unexpectedly in the middle of an advanced grammar or linguistics lesson? You may be right! An if-clause is the protasis. The term protasis is used in linguistics, to refer to the subordinate clause…